Sunday, May 08, 2005

Media Ball 2005

It’s 3am and I’m just home from the Media Ball. Don’t ask what I was doing there, long unintelligible story. Anyway there was Dancing Queen Peg Putt, ABC’s Peter Gee was going off, and there was the flotilla of Stepford Wives: self-possessed pretty little journalists flouncing about on the dance floor with seasoned old hacks old enough to know better. This was why I came, to watch these shenanigans unfold like gossip. And it was great.

However there is a “but”.

The ball was held at the Grand Chancellor. Hang your head in shame I say. My $85 got me a self-serve buffet: some fairly ok oysters, bland vegetables, dry pasta, and “5 star RSL carvery” lamb. The dessert buffet was fairly comprehensive, but kind of Fitzy’s City Caf. I sat there drinking the crap Stoney Ridge wine, eating my crap dinner, thinking about what I’d get for $85 a head at any number of my favourite restaurants.

Function coordinators need to understand that function food doesn’t have to be crap. It is lazy, unimaginative, cheap, and nasty. I could never recommend the Grand Chancellor’s food for functions. Sorry, it’s as simple as that.


Anonymous said...

What about the coleslaw??? I am tormented by the memory of that huge vat of coleslaw. And then there was that bowel of pink shit next to the oysters. WHAT WAS THAT? When I got home I rang Life Line but they wouldn't believe me. I can just see it now being squeezed out of that huge plastic bag and splat into the bowl it goes. "serve it up, they will love it!!!"
Greg oh Greg. You were right.

Tommy Arto said...

I too was at the ball. The food was secondary to the massive lot of entertainment served up on stage and on the dancefloor. Gosh, those journos can jive!
The pink stuff next to the oysters, my dear amonymous friend, is commonly known as 'five island dressing'. The plate of sliced tomatoes at the beginning of the Buffet table was my personal favourite.....Each tomato perfectly machined sliced and placed on the plate waiting for the salad sandwich, but heck no there were no salad sandwiches, this wasnt a girl guides conference, this was a Ball....someone forgot to tell the chef.
Apart from the food, the speech by Justice Pierre the highlight of my evening, I left with a glimmer of hope for the rebirth,the resurgence of quality journalism in Tasmania.

Tommy Arto said...

Question...Why dont ants have balls?
Answer.....Because they cant dance

bingeing ninja said...

Couple of points - the wine was Stoney Peak from Seppelts and possibly a step up from what you normally get on the rubber chicken circuit. Glad someone else was freaked out by the no taste coleslaw. X and Wellington *still* haven't got any new material (thank Christ for the Szeps kiddie). Pity the word "brevity" didn't feature in the list that Slicer kicked off his dronefest with (tho' he did get in a deserved dig at Terry Martin's scintillating verbal efforts).

Anonymous said...

The chancellor should have ordered pizza from La Bella, I believe the inmates loved it!